Is it right or wrong – How do you know?

As we grow from children to teenagers and then into adults, our learning never stops.

Along the way, we have many teachers.

Our parents are the first teachers.

The first lesson they teach is always about right and wrong.

They teach this lesson in many different ways.

As a baby, we would do many things.

For example, while having our diaper changed, we might put our hand in the excrement and then put the same hand in our mouth or we might put dangerous objects in our mouths. Our mother would see to it that we did not. Yet, we would do it again and again. With our mother’s persistent and constant reinforcement, we learned not to do that.

Consider this.

When a baby is born, it is always innocent. It is a blank slate. There is no writing on it.

tabula rasa

n. (Latin) blank slate (baby, person that has yet to learn his environment); something that exists in its original ancient or primitive state; fresh start, chance to start over without prejudice. (Babylon English)

As the baby grows, numerous sources influence its development.

On that blank slate, some writings will begin to appear. One set of writings comes from the religion of the mother and the father.

It is the religion that their parents taught them.

Other writings that are written on that slate come from members of the family, including aunts and uncles, etc.

Then, there is also the writing that comes from learning about different subjects at school. This too, shows up on the slate.

On the formerly blank slate of a child that develops into a teenager and into an adult; all of the writing that has been written on it, usually goes unquestioned.

For example, parents do not want their children to question the religion they teach them.  At the same time, they want their children to be safeguarded from what others teach them.

For example, a Sikh family would not want their children to be taught anything that opposes their belief in not cutting hair. A Christian family would not want their children to learn from the Koran, etc. But those families never consider that what they teach to their own children could be something they also need to suspect.

Most families are in the habit of raising their children in pre-constructed molds.  This works to some degree. It works until they become teenagers or the time when they start to think independently of their parents.

There is nothing wrong with thinking independently of one’s parents. This is part of the natural development cycle from that of a baby to a child, to a teenager and then into an adult.  But when a child asks questions, those questions can pose a threat.

There are varied reasons why parents may feel threatened. For example, it may be due to the way they had been raised.

Since most families are based upon patriarchy, where the male is the dominant figure and women the submissive, a father usually has more control than the mother. If he feels insecure about himself and perceives a loss of control over his children, he will impose control and will be aggressive and violent.

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